Aldon Smith Allegedly Put A Man To Sleep At A Chalmette Coffee House

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Aldon Smith Allegedly

Imagine actually seeing the news that Aldon Smith allegedly put a man to sleep at a coffee house in Chalmette. The greatest parish in the world, right by the Civic Center where local underdogs have fought it out. Supposedly, that is exactly what happened. Let’s take a dive into parish crime, as I know exactly where Aldon was in Chalmette. There is dead ass a French Press in front of the Home Depot as weird as it sounds.

Travers Mackel gets one of the most unfortunately witty news breaks of the year. It don’t get better than calling Chalmette a New Orleans suburb…

Bruh, has Travers been to the parish?

A “New Orleans Suburb” lol?

It must be mentioned that this is fucking huge for the French Press in Chalmette and the French Press brand in general. They are getting maximum exposure right now from Aldon reportedly utilizing his MMA chokes to lay a man down on April 17th. Shout out to AYS Sports Founder and Host, Blake Ruffino for sending me the alert text on all of this.

this is the most I hate Chalmette, but love Chalmette retweet of the day.


There is a video supposedly that was able to pick up the entirety of the situation at the French Press Coffee House in Chalmette. That video has not been released as of tonight, Monday night. This was stated by WDSU as well. Honestly, very intrigued to see that video, will release when released.

It should be noted that Seattle signed Smith recently to a no-risk contract which means they can cut him for no cost.

This is only two days after the Seahawks signed Aldon Smith as a free agent. As of now, they still haven’t found this dude from what I’m gathering. He hasn’t turned himself in, but we gotta imagine he will any minute now being he’s informed Seattle.

Seahawks fans?

Why the fuck was Aldon Smith in Chalmette, Louisiana?

I’ve dug deep in found out that Aldon has family in New Orleans and must’ve been craving a Honey-Dew bubble tea. With Chalmette just seven bumpy miles and a bridge away, one can imagine that Aldon pulled up this French Press adventure in google maps. He then probably ran into some stubborn son of a bitch from the parish and put the man to sleep before that fella could grab his Southern Pecan La Freeze.

That turned into a Southern Pecan La Sleep.

OR, AS OF TUESDAY…There has been another drop of drama added to this Chalmette scenario. Seems as if Aldon is saying he may have had cause to put this fella to sleep. Smith posted this, then deleted:

Regardless, it doesn’t look good for Aldon’s NFL career. BUT, don’t count this fella out for some celebrity boxing, a UFC career switch (Aldon vs. Hardy), or even a WWE run. Sometimes incidents like this can really turn things a direction ya never expected. Chalmette in the national news, whatta day.

Hopefully Aldon Smith has proper legal defense after that bizarre incident. He could easily call the boys at Domingue Law Firm as they would defend a man in Chalmette in seconds. Guilty or innocent, that isn’t proven till the courts have decided. The good common folks at Domingue Law Firm can get you outta some tragic shit ya never wanted to be in. Everybody has a bad day.

give em a call


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