Last week on paper published wasn’t so bad, but NFL Week 3 is gonna be me like it’s year 2000 again. I’m not satisfied or impressed with the outing last week because I fucked it all up with some greedy parlays and props. Finishing 5/8 on spread/ML picks is encouraging, but it was tarnished by pure stupidity and that’s what had me at the curb w/ the man again.
(last week on mayo spreads, click here)
Let’s Set The Table
We gonna start cooking tonight. I like the Panthers -8 against a team led by some dude that just isn’t gonna get the job done or even come close to getting the job done at Quarterback.
In a mind blowing turn of events, Sam Darnold is currently in a nice little groove at QB for the Panthers. I’m fucking sold that he will take care of business against this mess of a Texans team that has covered the last two weeks. Let’s go Joe Brady and Sammy D, carve these clowns up.
Mayo Selection: Panthers -8
Buffalo Smokes Em
Come on bruh, Buffalo has no choice but to continue their flow after beating the shit outta Miami and beat the shit outta this Washington Football Team. If they are really contenders, the Bills will win by more than 7 points. Taylor Heinicke proved to be human last Thursday night throwing a critical interception to lose the game.
Buffalo is at home, idk man I’m just thinking this is one of my best picks I can present this weekend. Josh Allen goes the fuck off.
Mayo Selection: Bills -7.5
The Fucking Raiders
Holy shit, this team is fucking nice. It was do or die this year in a Gruden era that has been nothing short of a mediocre disaster prior to this season. Welp, the now Vegas Raiders have come out swinging their dicks all over the field. Baltimore and Pittsburgh have both been victims of Derek Carr’s productivity and when Derek is productive, the Raiders are dangerous.
Derek slinging, Raiders are at home, gimme them fellas to cover against a Tua Tagivaloa-less Miami Dolphins squad.
Mayo Selection: Raiders -4
Brady or LA Staffy?
I wanna make this as little rocket science as possible. Tom Brady is on some different shit right now. Some elderly, prolific shit. He’s telling folks the game is way softer today in interviews and that just tells me he’s feeling himself. Rightfully, the man has thrown 9 touchdowns in two games. Antonio Brown is out and that doesn’t matter at all.
What matters is Tom Brady playing good enough to outlast one of those ole fashion shootouts on offense as he usually does. I’m picking Brady and the Bucs.
Mayo Selection: Bucs -1
Saints/Pats OVER!
Taking the week off investing in my home team to win, but rather counting on two gun slingers to show up and make it a shootout.
Jameis Winston versus Mac Jones in New England sounds like a game that’ll certainly go over 42.5 points. I’m expecting to see a little more Taysom, but the way Payton uses him in the regular season historically that should mean that he’s gonna get up the field.
Not asking for a zillion points here, just looking for Jameis to light it up…the field not the dome and not literally just figuratively.
Mayo Selection: Saints/Pats o/42.5 points
Parlay Pudding
Can’t get outta here without providing something to nibble on after the main course. I’ll leave ya with this Parlay Pudding and be back with some prop tarts on Sunday morning.
- Panthers ML
- Bills ML
- Raiders ML
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