It’s currently 11:23 AM, I’ve been asking my neighbor for some “coffee” and it seems he isn’t taking this release as serious as I am. Also think I have a fucking cold, just took some DayQuill. But, whatever just means that I’ll have to smoke so much weed that I turn into a Mortal Kombat character myself.
Problem With Watching Mortal Kombat Right Now
Reason being is that the movie won’t release till 2am our time down here in New Orleans. That’s roughly two hours and 35 minutes away from my vision right now. The first seven minutes were fantastic and released on HBO MAX earlier this week. I watched Sub-Zero freeze a mother and her daughter. Shit was wild.
Got a great feeling the plot will be just as good as the plot honestly was in the 1996 Mortal Kombat film. They all went to this big tournament and it had some backstories to it throughout. For a 90’s flick, fantastic. It’s got the TV-MA rating for the trailer and the exclusive R-rating for the movie.
As of now it’s just me, a little debbie brownie, and my dog chummin’ in SpreadQuarters waiting for the tournament to start.
Just remembered I did a if Rappers were Mortal Kombat characters blog about a year ago that I may revamp for the occasion and Free Mouth Friday.
- will make a gas station trip here soon to pick up a soda of some sort.
- do have enough cigs for the night.
- the dog won’t make it, he’s sleeping.
- my phone is not charged.
- I’m already max capacity stoned.
What we know:
- Kano seems to be working with Sonya in the trailer. It also shows Sonya putting a foot on his throat at the end. He should still be an asshole.
- Sub-Zero looks to be Bi-Han. Seems to be an asshole, his brother Kuai-Lang was a lot more peaceful.
- I don’t see Shao Khan, Kitana or Johnny Cage in the trailer.
- Sonya does NOT have a MK marking.
That could be because of a future sequel on all three of those fellas.
Lemme just say I didn’t take my fucking eyes off this movie. It was action packed the entire way through and left ya little time to bitch about what it didn’t present. Not all the characters you’d want in ya Mortal Kombat collection are in this movie, but it’s clear to see that there will be a sequel that brings in some other characters. Even my favorite character, Johnny Cage will most certainly play a part in the future.
Who ya can expect:
- Liu Kang
- Shao Kahn
- Shang Tsung
- Sonya Blade
- Kung Lao
- Scorpion, Hanzo
and maybe a couple others.
Sub-Zero is a bad fucking man. The baddest man in the movie and single handedly is the biggest issue for Raiden’s team.
I enjoyed the entire film, it left a little to be desired on storyline, but if ya just do ya homework before hand in refreshing you will be fantastic. Zero chance you get stoned and don’t have a blast.
Mayo Rating: 8/10
This entire movie experience with mayo is brought to ya by 360 Home Inspection Services. Ya don’t wanna buy a nice, new home and find out that it was used for a death match tournament prior. Which is exactly why ya don’t want a stranger to inspect ya home. Have an exclusive holder in Stevin Lacoste come inspect ya new home as he’ll be looking for shit like death match marks, flooding, and animal hording.
Make the call.