Welcome to The Game Pantry, where we will be wasting not one fucking minute during this quarantine. Time to really get some long overdue deciphering out of the way. We give you 24 seeds, of the most dominating video games in the years past, and let them fuck it out for supremacy. How does that sound? Great, grab a snack and come on in the pantry. All live polls will be running on our stomping grounds, Facebook @ HTM Gaming. Do not miss this shit pal.
FIRST ROUND RESULTS
|(1) Grand Theft Auto 5||Bye (Will face GTA IV Tuesday)|
|(2) Minecraft||Bye (Will play winner of 15 & 18)|
|(3) Super Mario World||Bye (Will play winner of 14 & 19)|
|(4) Wii Sports||Bye (Will play Vice City Wednesday)|
|(5) Pokemon Red/Yellow/Blue||Bye (Will play Donkey Kong Wednesday)|
|(6) The Legend of Zelda||Bye (Will play winner of 11 & 22)|
|(7) Tony Hawk Pro Skater 1||Bye (Will play winner of 10 & 23)|
|(8) Counter-Strike||Bye (Will play NCAA 2004 Tuesday)|
|(9) Fortnite||Loss to NCAA 2004 (13%-87%)|
|(10) Skyrim||Loss to Super Mario 64 (18%-82%)|
|(11) Halo Combat Evolved||Loss to COD MW 4 (60%-40%)|
|(12) COD Black Ops II||Loss to Donkey Kong (40%-60%)|
|(13) GTA: Vice City||Beat Bioshock (93%-7%)|
|(14) RDR II||Loss to GoldenEye 007 (70%-30%)|
|(15) Gears of War||Loss to Super Smash Bros (18%-82%)|
|(16) Witcher 3: Wild Hunt||Loss to GTA IV (23%-77%)|
|(17) Grand Theft Auto IV||Beat Witcher 3 (77%-23%)|
|(18) Super Smash Bros. Melee||Beat Gears of War (82%-18%)|
|(19) GoldenEye 007||Beat RDRII (70%-30%)|
|(20) BioShock||Loss to GTA Vice City (7%-93%)|
|(21) Donkey Kong Country||Beat COD Black Ops II (60%-40%)|
|(22) COD Modern Warfare||Beat Halo Combat Evolved (60%-40%)|
|(23) Super Mario 64||Beat Skyrim (82%-18%)|
|(24) NCAA Football 2004||Beat Fortnite (87%-13%)|
Game Pantry Politics
Alright motherfuckers, I know that we left a few out. It doesn’t mean that the fucking game wouldn’t go in my console or computer, or that I hate computer guys and gals. No, none of that is whats going on here. Decsions had to be made, and it was really fucking tough for me to leave out the following games in this tournament…
- Mortal Kombat
- Tecmo Football
- MAX PAYNE
- League of Legends
- Dark Souls
- Any other fucking soul grabbing nerd game
- and not PAC MAN…
Sorry, but this event will prove to still be incredible.
NCAA Football 2004 beat the brakes off of Fornite. This basically implies that the people following HTM are most likely a bunch of bros who can’t wait to play NCAA on their consoles again. Honestly, I’m one of those closed minded individuals who voted for NCAA too. I like a good story, fuck it.
Game Pantry Disrespect
There was some atrocious disrespect towards 2015 game of the year, The Witcher. There is no fucking way that GTA IV is a better experience. People just slept under a mountain when that game came out and never woke up. No true love shown towards Witcher, Gears, or Black Ops II. How could we not show up at all for those games?
Game Pantry Update: Mario Smashes Skyrim
Super Mario 64 showed no fucking mercy in running Skyrim out the building on Monday. Skyrim was considered by most, one of the most incredible games ever played. Took endless hours away from lives in 2011. However, the people continue to vote nostalgic as it seems to be a trend.
|(1)GTA V vs. (17)GTA IV||Winner: (1)GTA V|
|(8)CounterStrike vs. (24)NCAA Football 2004||Winner: (24)NCAA Football 2004|
|(4)Wii Sports vs. (13)GTA Vice City||Winner: (13) Vice City|
|(5)Pokemon Red/Yellow/Blue vs. (21)Donkey Kong Country||Winner: (5)Pokemon Red/Yellow/Blue|
|(2)MineCraft vs. (18)Super Smash Bros. Melee||Winner: (18)Super Smash Bros.|
|(7)Tony Hawk Pro Skater 1 vs. (23)Super Mario 64||Winner: (7)Tony Hawk Pro Skater 1|
|(3)Super Mario World vs. (19)GoldenEye 007||Winner: (19)GoldenEye 007|
|(6)The Legend of Zelda vs. (22)COD 4: Modern Warfare||Winner: |
(22)COD 4: Modern Warfare
Who The Fuck Will Beat (1)GTA V?
That is the question buzzin around the pantry this last week. Are we wasting our time right now? Potentially, because there is no shot in blue hell that (24)NCAA Football 2004, and Carson Palmer take out Trevor, Mike, and an original gangster like Franklin. That dog don’t walk pal, however I could see (18)Super Smash Bros. making a fucking stout run right here. Keep a lookout for Luigi, Mario, Peach, Bowser, and all those other fools.
|(1)GTA V vs. (24)NCAA Football 2004||Winner:|
|(18)Smash Bros. vs. (7)Tony Hawk Pro Skater 1||Winner:|
(7)Tony Hawk Pro Skater 1
|(5)Pokemon Red, Yellow, Blue vs. (13)Vice City||Winner:|
|(19)GoldenEye007 vs. (22)COD 4:ModernWarfare||Winner:|
Keep up with the mayo for all game pantry updates on the greatest game ever poll presented by Hold The Mayo.
THE FINAL FOUR
Here we are after tons of emotional matchup’s in the last couple weeks. I’ve lost friends over this shit man. However, most can agree that this final four is quite appropriate. The people spoke, and it was thousands over on facebook that made the decision. They can’t all be idiots, and surely you had a fair opportunity yourself to make a difference. We now start this bloodbath to determine which game reigns superior amongst them all.
|(7)Tony Hawk Pro Skater 1 vs. (19)GoldenEye007||Winner:|
|(1)Grand Theft Auto V vs. (5)Pokemon Red, Yellow, Blue||Winner:|
THE END GAME
After an emotional loss to GoldenEye, (7)Tony Hawk grabs his board and heads back to California or some shit. That shit hurt me, I personally think Hawk had a case for best video game ever. Pokemon fell in the most tragic fashion. They were up for the entire contest, and with one hour left the GTA crackheads showed up in volume. They notched a two vote victory, 99-97. The win would leave Pokemon freak faces all over disappointed and hurt. However, a tremendous run by Ash and the gang.
The journey ends here in a battle between Bond and Rockstar. Honestly, there is nothing to complain about here. Both of these fucking games demand respect in the world we live in today, past or present. Time to look yourself in the mirror, and vote with ya soul on this one.
|(19)GoldenEye007 vs. (1)Grand Theft Auto V||IN PLAY|