Zlatan Always Goes Full Zlatan

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Zlatan Ibrahimovic has to be one of the few nominees for greatest fucking human on this planet. He parted ways with the LA Galaxy today after two seasons of pure Zlatan glory and wreckage. Any man who walks the walk like Zlatan is a man we can all get behind. This dude walks the fucking good walk. In two MLS seasons, Zlatan finished with 52 goals in 56 games. It wasn’t just a “solid” run by Zlatan Ibrahimovic. It was a god damn doozie.

How bizarre is it that Zlatan’s first goal went down like it did? Not bizarre at all when you consider the human. Zlatan just makes it happen and then he tells you why he’s the greatest on the planet when its over. Most would explain how it happened, or even how it felt. Zlatan takes a different approach and just reminds everyone to be grateful that they get to see him with their own two eyes.

It’s a privilege to see this man play the game of Soccer.

It was an honor to have this man in the United States playing a game that most people won’t give a respectable chance in blue hell. Zlatan oh so graciously brought all the smoke to MLS and didn’t waste anyone’s time in the process. I mean lawd, it was a legendary run by one of the most entertaining players in the history of this great sport. He wasn’t playing to help soccer grow popularity in America. Ibra was playing to continue his absurdly overlooked legacy in this sport. He made some cats look damn stupid during this illustrious run. Proof is in the pudding.

Zlatan went full Zlatan for two straight years as a member of this Galaxy team. The dude’s numbers are quite impressive for a man who is approaching 40 years old. The moments are unforgettable. Seriously, Zlatan showcased some unfathomable talent while chumming in California. From the first fucking goal till the end, Zlatan showed up. What’s next for Ibra? Whatever the fuck he wants. Hold it.

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